About Son of Man

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

The Furlough is Ova'

The furlough is over and I am glad to be back. I thought a good way to celebrate would be to share some more REALLY BAD POETRY. I give you, Fred Emerson Brooks. To read an entire poem by this master would be too much altogether so I will only give you a few dumplings of wonder from his glorious verse.

From Foreigners on Santa Claus

The bonnie Scotchman niver doot
Wi' Scots Wauhi!
That Santa Claus goes a' aboot...

We have ze Santa Claus een France
We see him when we get ze chance.

And now
, from The Stuttering Lover (this is my buddy Caleb's fav.)

I lu-love you very well,
Much mu-more than I can tell,
With a lu-lu-lu-lu-love I cannot utter;
I kn-know just what to say,
But my tongue gets in the way,
And af-fe-fe-fe-fe-fection's bound to stutter!

When a wooer wu-wu-woos,
And a cooer cu-cu-coos,
Till his face is re-re-red like a tomato,
Take his heart in bi-bi-bits,
Every portion fi-fi-fits,
Though his love su-su-seem, somewhat stuccato

I will wu-worship you, of course,
And nu-never get divorce,
Though you stu-stu-stu-stu-storm in angery weather,
For whu-when you're in a pique
So mu-mad you cannot speak,
We'll be du-du-du-du-dumb then both together.

I love the stuccato love. What is "pique?"


Blogger Lydia said...

"i wil wu-worship you, of course,
and nu-never get divorce"

HAHAHAHHA. amazing. LOL!!!

10:05 PM  
Blogger Chris Hillcoat said...

Pique is when you feel a bit lairy.

Also note that correct pronunciation of "tomato" is required to rhyme with "stuccato"; unless you say that differently as well!

9:42 AM  
Blogger Son of Man said...

Chris, YOU TALK FUNNY. Just admit it and come to terms with it.

9:45 AM  
Blogger amac said...

now i know where lisa simpson got her Valentine day cards from. "I cho-cho-choose you"

and Chris, 'lairly' isn't a word. come on now, big blumbering brit

10:47 AM  
Blogger Chris Hillcoat said...

There's more of us than there are of you. Furthermore, I am British. Therefore, I am right and you are wrong.

(Ooh - controversial!)

1:13 PM  
Blogger Jess said...

hahaha...too funny. I got that Valentine once Andrew. The british have always been pretty dodgey.

10:22 PM  
Blogger Son of Man said...

Chris is getting HAMMERED here. We love you Chris....you lairy geezer.

10:31 PM  
Blogger Chris Hillcoat said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

1:43 PM  
Blogger Chris Hillcoat said...

The fact is, that I have an English accent that Churchill himself would be happy to use; whereas you are forever doomed to sound like a flannel-shirted cretin with a beaverskin hat.

3:30 PM  
Blogger shellieos said...

that is just SO jokes!

2:34 PM  
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